You're kidding me right?

This is the stupidest thing a human being could say to another human being.

Why?

Because it is always said when the person it's being said to is quite not kidding.

"I'd like to check status on my blinds. I was told they'd be delivered to me today" No, they're still in production

"You're KIDDING ME!"

Sigh...seriously? That's something you think I would say as a joke right? My job is customer service, and you think I'd tell you something like that to be funny? What a bizarre sense of humor you have.

And why do people not understand simple concepts like, estimated ship date. Doesn't estimated mean "It might go on that day, or it might not".

"But she promised me..." She who?
"The girl I placed the order with!" What did she say exactly?
"That the due date was today!" Did she promise you she would rush it for completion yesterday to ship today?
"Well, no, but she said it would go out no problem". Next time, listen closely when she says ESTIMATED. No, I'm NOT kidding you.

Life's lessons learned today:
1) I.T. guys are arrogant asshats
2) Life is not a box of chocolates, it's more like a jar of barbed wire and battery acid.
3) Chihuahuas are the greatest thing mankind ever created. Nothing else in your life will ever love you as thoroughly, or moistly.
4) Music really does sooth the savage bitch. That and chocolate.
5) Friends are defined as the people who keep you from randomly killing everyone who pisses you off.

RIP Billy Mays

No more Oxy Clean, Awesome Auger, Mighty Putty or Kaboom. Who now, will convince me, that Orange Clean will clean better than anything I own?

see more Lol Celebs

Because, dude, that Shamwow guy gives me the creeps.

An atheist walks into a Starbuck's

Sounds like a great entry for a joke, but this time, it happens to be the opening for a great story...

We went to Starbuck's today for a hot dark roast for me (hazelnut and cream, no sugar), and an iced coffee for Marcella. While waiting, the old man behind Marcella, apparently having read the back of her shirt, wanted to know what the front of her shirt said. She was wearing a Crass shirt, the one that says on the back "the nature of your oppression is the aesthetic of our anger". The front says "Jesus died for his own sins, not mine". I was a little anxious, worried that a Christian rant might be impending if we tell him. So I politely tell him it might offend him. He smiles real big at me and tells me nothing offends him, that he has a real liberal MySpace and I probably wouldn't let Marcella on it. So, I figure, what the fuck. I tell him what her shirt says (The Jesus part is faded out and hard to read). He immediately grins, and tells us "well, of course he did", and that he worships no god but himself. Marcella and I were in awe, and were giggling...he had us laughing. We ended up talking about Richard Dawkins and PZ Meyers, and it was the greatest thing. And in Norco, home of the neverending "Yes on Prop 8" signs. Sweet. The best part is, he was wearing a military vet cap. There's an old quote, I think by MacArthur or someone like that, that there are no atheists in foxholes. I think we've just proven that wrong. In fact, I figure that's exactly where atheists would BE made...when you're down in the foxholes, in the trenches, and shells are whizzing over your head and your buddies are dying all around you...that's the precise moment you realize there is no God.

Weirdest thing that happened today: Marcella's phone was "auto filling" during a text...and after she typed "I want a" the phone filled in the gap with "cool bitch". WTF??

Repressed Again

Apparently, I'm not allowed the luxury of anger. It's been this way all of my life it seems. I get mad, someone makes me stop it. I get mad, someone else gets madder, and blows it all out of proportion. My parents. Certain of my friends. I have a bad temper. I don't deny that. I always have. But I was never allowed to channel it. Only to block it. I grew up repressed, and ended up having people think of me as weak and girly, because instead of getting mad and telling people how I feel, I was taught to repress it by those around me, and so instead, I'd cry. And have occasional panic attacks from the anger I wasn't allowed to express. Or I'd just act loud and stupid and dramatic. Anything to vent something so my temper wouldn't explode and go horribly awry.

I tried to break free. I tried to have an occasionally angry opinion. I tried to voice it without being mean or unkind. I thought I was doing rather well. I was certainly feeling better, less closed up, less panicky.

And then my husband picked up where my parents left off. And lately, my daughter as well. If they do something that displeases me, I apparently can't say so. I'm supposed to just ignore it and hope it goes away. I'm supposed to not have a temper, and instead run around with rainbows and sunshine falling out of my holly jolly ass, no matter how annoying anyone else is. Mind you, they're allowed, especially my daughter, to be angry, Rick is allowed to swear and yell at other drivers on the road, Marcella gets to be angry and aggressive when I ask her to do something, but when I act like a parent, I'm "being very angry". If I yell at other drivers, I'm "making a big deal". Sigh.

If they're not repressing me, someone at work is. Don't be mad, don't voice your frustration, don't rock the boat, stay calm, talk it out with your supervisor. It's never ending.

I guess I'll just give up, and become a passive aggressive milquetoast the rest of my life. Whatever.